How To Postpone Productivity

I’m working on a memoir of short stories from all the characters in my family. Such as my grandma who wore trucker hats, and lived off of cigarettes and hot-toddies, to my little sister who is convinced that my step-mother had all of her babies from her butt, to my brother who died from mixing prescription valium with beer, my stripper, construction-worker mother, and my Iranian, businessman father. I bet you often wonder how I’m so “well-rounded,” and now you know! Anyhow, I’m working on a memoir and the most difficult thing isn’t writing it’s avoiding the internet. I write one sentence and then suddenly I’m reading about human taxidermy. I write a paragraph and I’m watching videos of a baby poking a bull-dog in the eye. Five minutes later I’m watching videos of a pig giving birth. And now you are too! I’m taking you down with me!

Have a great day! 


2 thoughts on “How To Postpone Productivity

  1. Naphtali

    ………………..So reading this I went to a pig giving birth, really something gross. From there I went to a deer giving birth in front of children on a school trip, to a tiger almost sitting on her cub being delivered to white lion cubs, eight pug puppies and then a tiger that tried to attack a baby through the glass and the parent thought it was cute; after that I ended up watching a live birth all on youtube. Oh the adventure I was on.


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